Contraries

by Joanna Chapman-Smith

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1.
Urbanity 03:46
I used to dream of leaving the city Of going to New Zealand and living off the land And Under the sky But by now I’m tied to the city I grew up in Toronto, Canada Went to a little art school where I learned to paint and dance and play It was in an old building I always preferred the old to the new Now I’m an artist living in Vancouver I stay in a yellow house where I rent a room And by now I’m tied to the city I love the city lights And the freeway at night When the golden sun melts down The city comes to life So many faces And such anonymity Fragmented Stories And Changing Identities And by now I’m tied to the city Yes by now I’m tied to the city
2.
Where are you from? Or better yet: Where are your parents from? Or should I ask after your particles, Your ashes and your dust? These arbitrary lines they’re getting in my way They’re getting in my way These arbitrary lines they’re getting in my way They’re getting in my way So what is pure? And what is right? How 'bout natural and real? Where do these lines first come from? Who marks them down and why? These arbitrary lines they’re getting in my way They’re getting in my way These arbitrary lines they’re getting in my way They’re getting in my way He took my heart He took my home He took everything I owned But who am I to draw a line That says what’s his and what is mine? But then again! Sometimes I need a line to lead the way And then again to whisper sweetly To hold me close and say: These arbitrary lines they’re getting in my way They’re getting in my way These arbitrary lines they’re getting in my way They’re getting in my way
3.
I have a flare for folly and a talent for torment What is fear if not my friend? These feelings get me through And I don’t know why but I think of you I drank a glass of wine and I saw you looking oh so fine but I Didn’t think we had the time So I just kept on dreaming how I’d make you mine I try try to get it right But it feels so right to get it wrong Why why get it right when it feels much better just to get along? I visited my family but not stay I filled up my glass and put it away But there’s a hole in the bottom that I just can’t make Any better without first making it break I try try to get it right But it feels so right to get it wrong Why why get it right when it feels much better just to get along? Well water gets through anything It just drips and drips and lets itself in One day I will always win But for now I don’t know where to begin I seek happy ends in wine and wisdom and all of my friends I’ll fill my glass again but for now I just don’t know when I try try to get it right But it feels so right to get it wrong Why why get it right when it feels much better just to get along?
4.
5.
My mind: a box and a line that I cannot define Why I believe what I believe, would make me bow my head in shame if I only knew If we say there are thousands of us, and call our dreams our own, Let’s agree to disagree on the things we cannot hold My mind, I can feel it sometimes, like when I behold your eyes from the other side and I think: “I’m not mad because of anything you do. I just need some sleep and the turning of the moon” So I rest and I sleep and I hold you tight, the smiles and the butterflies are silver and bright And we breathe before our passions rise Ooooh. I believe: the truth it lies between us, the truth it lies between us And I will do my best to reach – to try to reach to you – to try to tough the truth So maybe we fight My mind, I can feel it sometimes: a box and a line that I cannot define Why I believe what I believe would make me bow my head in shame, if I only knew So maybe we fight (The truth it lies between us) So maybe we fight (The truth it lies between us) So maybe we fight (The truth it lies between us) So maybe we fight (The truth it lies between us) The truth it lies between us Between us
6.
Things Are Gonna Go Wrong Things Are Gonna Go Wrong I’m gonna make mistakes sometimes Things Are Gonna Go Wrong But now that I know I can let off that load Things Are Gonna Go Wrong Things Are Gonna Go Wrong Things Are Gonna Feel Bad Things Are Gonna Feel Bad I’m gonna get hurt sometimes Things Are Gonna Feel Bad But now that I know I can let off that load Things Are Gonna Feel Bad Things Are Gonna Feel Bad Gonna lay down my worries Gonna lay down my fears ‘Cause I ben carrying them for far too long Gonna move my load on Gonna take my mind away To find myself a better day On this road that I’m on This road I’m carrying on Things Are Gonna Go Right Things Are Gonna Go Right If I try as I might Things Are Gonna Go Right But now that I know I can let off that load Things Are Gonna Go Right Things Are Gonna Go Right
7.
I want to live in a tactile world where each line in my skin, each pulse of my heart Stretches, extending, unfolding, unfurled, massaging in To each piece, each part The touch of my skin, begins sinking in Devouring the pristine and trading for, mmmmm, Feeling, bradaoo, feeling, bradaoo With deep lines and one-of-a-kind, this clay and marble art sets my senses free Free to the touch, no laws, no lines, no glass, no guards, No lock, no key This touch, to me, it means so much Feeling, bradaoo, feeling, bradaoo One day, I’m going to need to hold you What is love if we never do? Overwhelm me, I beg of you This could be beauty I write this in an ancient book with leather skin that crumbles and frays And thick pages I am just writing away As it finally lives today Today, today Feeling, bradaoo, feeling, bradaoo
8.
Melodies 03:34
Snow where now there’s summer Hunger now I’m full A Charcoal masterpiece in the sand The crow that flew away Melodies fading fast Memories just flying past Some of these will never last What’s then left to say? In the morning light In the morning light I roll to my right And open my eyes And I see you there Yes I see you there Well some of these were built to last What’s then left to say? Canvas now there’s colour Quiet in a chord An empty hall in a crowded room The day you said you’d stay Melodies fading fast Memories just flying past Some of these will come at last What’s then left to say?
9.
10.
Dub Mother 00:21
11.
In The Quiet 05:34
I’m a snowflake falling on a desert floor I close my heart up to yours And fix it to be free The mind and the body can be Bitter enemies Do you know what I mean? I ride the wind and I scream From the pleasure and with pain I lose my voice again and again and again I lost my voice around the time I lost you And cried for joy or sorrow into a glass or two (sigh) Some things take shape in the negative space Opposition, resistance, control Struggling to let it all go Happy ends means letting you go Go Go Go Go Silence holds a circle round I have been too proud I listen to my heart in the quiet now It whispers what it will not allow I ride the wind and I scream From the pleasure and with pain Some things I learn again and again and again
12.
For Good 05:56
You first came along Written like a riddle that only I had read Now that you’re going I find myself thinking of all the tears I shed And we still say: I love you And the pity is: every word’s still true If this is the last time I know I’m going to miss this soon Because if this is the last time We are gonna wish that we could be back here real soon And yes if this is the last time We are gonna wish that we could be back here for good – for good Ooh. You push me away every time I go to embrace And you push me away When my lips lean in to kiss And you make me leave when all I wanna do is stay I wait for the moments just like this Because if this is the last time We are gonna wish that we could be back here real soon And yes if this is the last time We are gonna wish that we could be back here for good – for good Ooh. I dream of infinity I dream of infinity And I will wait for you My angel My marble statue Because if this is the last time We are gonna wish that we could be back here real soon And yes if this is the last time
13.
You’re not the only one You’ll have your day in the sun Where has the carnival gone? Where has the carnival gone? You’re not the only one The freaks and the strangers will come Where has the carnival gone? Where has the carnival gone? I’m not the only one A freak and a stranger I’m one Where has the carnival gone? Where has the carnival gone? Let the games begin As the tilterwhirl starts to spin My house is open, come in The mirrors here twist and grin A shadow and an echo of fun You’re lost and you’re left all alone Where has the carnival gone? Where has the carnival gone?

credits

released January 30, 2009

Performing:
Joanna Chapman-Smith - Lead & Backing Vocals, Guitar, Keys, Clarinet
Featuring 'The Tryst':
Wayne Adams - Drums, Backing Vocals
Justine Fischer - Stand-Up Bass, Backing Vocals
Dawn Zoe - Accordion, Backing Vocals
And With Special Guests:
Tim Chapman-Smith - Whistling
Dan Chapman-Smith - Vocals
Christina Zaenker - Cello
Marc l'Esperance - Tenor Saxophone, Violin
Carolyna Loveless, Sarah MacDougall & Chris Suen - Backing Vocals

All words and music by Joanna Chapman-Smith except tracks 9 & 10 (Chapman-Smith / The Tryst) and 13 (Chapman-Smith / Bucky Coe)
Recorded and Mixed by Adam Popowitz at Rear Window Sound & Song
Co-Produced by Joanna Chapman-Smith & Adam Popowitz, except tracks 11 & 13 (recorded & mixed by Marc l'Esperance at Heavy-O-Sonic Studios, co-produced by Chapman-Smith & l'Esperance) & track 5 (vocals recorded by Peter Katz at Peter's Underpants Studio & drums recorded by Wayne Adams at P.D. Padee Podee Production Studios)
Mastered by Todd Simko at Hearing Protection Required.
Design by L. Basil McMahon (www.undrtheweather.org)

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Joanna Chapman-Smith Toronto, Ontario

"Uniquely talented... She’s got the whole package" - The Toronto Star [CAN]

“Chapman-Smith... rises above the herd of folkie singer-songwriters, her musical self-portrait painted with an unusually large palette of moods and colours.” - The Georgia Straight [CAN]

“Exceptional… a creative and skilled vocalist.” - NPR [USA]

“The slinky-voiced Canadian" - Q Magazine [UK]
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